http://bhamweekly.com/birmingham/articles.sec-76-1-girls-not-raised-in-the-south.html Mix my martini, fast: it's back to school in the Magic City. As summer slowly folds up like the last beach umbrella at sunset, we shake the sand out of our sandals, dust off the Mary Janes, and brace ourselves once again for the sheer horror of what lies ahead: the back to school ride through hell.]]> As another summer blazes through the Magic City (a town which might just as well have been built directly on the face on the sun), your very own Scarlet has taken to the porch swing at the Villa to watch the neighborhood parade, thoroughly...]]> June is once again upon us, and this sleepy Magic City slips slowly into its annual summer coma like the quiet summer rain on our rooftop as darkness falls. Awaiting the advent of football season, we slumber in our hammocks, up to our eyeballs in homemade peach cobbler, while visions of quarterbacks dance in our heads.]]> Mix your mimosa and settle into your hammock, the lazy days of summer have arrived. June is once again upon us, and this sleepy Magic City slips slowly into its annual summer coma like the qui]]> Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water again, it’s “Divorce at the Beach”. More ominous than a shark attack, the beginning of summer heralds into San Destin an entourage of Birmingham’s illustrious divorce attorneys for their...]]> Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water again, it's "Divorce at the Beach". More ominous than a shark attack, the beginning of summer heralds into San Destin an entourag]]> This curious southern ritual, while oddly entertaining, has always baffled me inasmuch as southerners seem to know quite well , at any given time, the intimate goings on of one another's personal affairs, and one is left to wonder just what remains to be discussed over the roast quail.]]> Don your frocks, tie your bowtie, and break out the Valium--it is time once again to penetrate one of the most charmingly deceptive veneers of southern graciousness: The Dinner Party. This cur]]> No one rivals a southern woman in her expertise in the hunt, capture, and inevitable destruction of her prey, as evidenced by the steadily increasing pile of wedding invitations on Scarlet�€™s desk. Always anxious to follow decorum, I consulted a regional expert in southern tradition for fashion advice on what to wear to an upcoming nuptial event.]]> Longer languid days, wisteria, and barbeques herald in once again the beginning of one of the most curiously intriguing and oddly entertaining of southern phenomenons: dating in the south. No one rivals a southern woman in her expertise in the hunt, capture, and inevitable destruction of her prey, as evidenced by the steadily increasing pile of wedding invitations on Scarlet's desk.]]> One must always listen carefully to a southern woman, because even the most stinging insults are served up with so much honey that an unfortunate non-native, such as Scarlet, can be caught completely off guard. Like a snake bite, the gracious southern woman swiftly renders her victim paralyzed and defenseless.]]>