Shuttlesworth Soul Food Dinner

honoring Birmingham's greatest civil rights leader

On Thursday October 25, you can be a part of the commemoration of the first anniversary of the death of Birmingham's Civil Rights legend, Reverend Fred Shuttlesworth. In honor of her late husband,

Avondale Bricks Weekly Dinners

Catalan, a highly acclaimed Spanish restaurant in Washington, D.C., before returning to Birmingham to work in some of the most prestigious restaurants. His career includes stops at the Five Star and Five Diamond resort The Homestead in Hot Springs, Virginia, as well as Citronelle, iRicchi, and the Ritz- Carlton in Washington, D.

Art Opening at Avondale Bricks

You will also have a chance to view the long-term installation of Cuban artwork by artists in prestigious collections around the world from the Museum of Modern Art in New York to the Birmingham Museum of Art in Birmingham, Alabama..

Chris Davis vs Chris Davis

A TALE OF TWO CHRISES

I’m Chris Davis. I’ve been Chris Davis for as long as I can remember. Maybe even longer. Although I’m the only Chris Davis in my family, circle of friends and neighborhood, I realize there are others in the world that bear my name as well.

Charlie, I told you not to call me

FIRST COLUMN FROM THE ANGRY TRIBUNE OF THE RADICAL MIDDLE (AND OF FREAKS EVERYWHERE)

Amerika’s the name. Syd Amerika. Remember it. Scratch it into your arm with a linoleum knife. Scribble it on a cocktail napkin with a pencil stub that’s longer than your boyfriend’s shvantz. I don’t care.

Eight Days A Week

| Zamora Temple, 3531 Ratliff Rd. | 4:45pm | $15 at door, $10 online, kids under 8 FREE | (205)534-0166.

Eight Days

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 28TH Andrew Dice Clay at Comedy Club Stardome..

EightDays

Everything I have heard about it has been great and I trust my sources, almost to a fault. If you don’t already know, the play is about the witches in Wizard of Oz before Dorothy came into their lives or ended one of their lives with her house. I’m sure the Wicked Witch of the West wasn’t always bad, right? Therapists were expensive back then.

Eight Days

Creating Memorable Images with Your Digital Camera.

Eight Days

However, if that groundhog retreats back into its hole then winter will continue for another six weeks. I’m headed to the Birmingham Zoo to see for myself if Birmingham Bill retreats back into his hole or stays out to enjoy the day. Get there early to place your prediction in the prediction box, make a craft and enjoy hot cocoa and coffee.

EightDays

Bobby Collins is hilarious and has a great following as well. Laughing out loud with this crowd is a hoot. Bobby has a cult following and the crowd can be as much fun as the show. With more than 200 stand-up performances across the country each year, Collins has hit the stage from concert halls to cruise ships.

EightDays

12 THURS Bela Fleck Okay, for this Thursday I have chosen a show at the Alys Stephens Center.

EightDays

5 THURS Comedian Dale Jones is performing all weekend long at the Comedy Club Stardome.

EightDays

22 THURS Winter Solstice is the shortest day of the year which means it is all uphill from here, literally.

EightDays

15 THURS Toys for Tots Tis’ the season for giving and I don’t believe we have a fundraiser yet for this “8 days” so tonight make it out to The Clothes Tree by Deborah on Old Rocky Ridge Rd to help raise money for Toys for Tots which is an awesome charity this time of year.

EightDays

8 WED 8 WED STEAK! Okay, it has been two weeks since Thanksgiving and all of the turkey, stuffing and sweet potato casserole with marshmallows on top is all gone.

EightDays

1 THURS Tapas Wine Dinner. If you’re looking for something that will bring out your inner sommelier then look no further. Tonight Renae Mickler of Grape Expectations is hosting a tapas wine dinner at Cosmo’s in Five Points.

EightDays

Ballet in Cinema Have you got a lot of family in town for Thanksgiving and getting kind of stir crazy having everyone in the house? Go check out the Ballet in Cinema Series at Carmike in the Summit.

EightDays

17 THURS Yet another good FUNdraiser comes our way with the third installment of Beer on the Backporch at the Ruffner Mountain Nature Center.

EIGHT DAYS

10 THURS Reel Raffle. I like going to raffles especially when there is a chance to win. This raffle isn’t just for a rinky-dink iPod, it is for $10,000.

Free Will Astrology (October 14, 2010)

Running ahead of Satan but behind God are Lady Gaga and Justin Beiber. If I were you, Capricorn, I wouldn’t be Google-searching any bigger-than-life entities like those four in the coming week.

Free Will Astrology (September 30, 2010)

“Three Blind Mice” was his favorite, but there were others that also calmed him sufficiently to allow me safe passage. Something comparable may work for you, Taurus, as you navigate past the crabby wretches and twitchy pests and pathetic demons in the coming days.

Free Will Astrology (September 23, 2010)

Your pleasurable duty is to love what’s in the midst of changing, and not fixate on trying to make arrangements that will supposedly last forever. Don’t just grudgingly attend to the mercurial details; dive in as if playing with them were your central purpose.

Free Will Astrology (September 16, 2010)

Can you picture yourself working harder to give your body the food and sleep and movement it requires to be at its best? If you have any doubts about how to proceed, ask your body to provide you with clues..

Free Will Astrology (September 2, 2010)

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In an old comedy sketch called “One Leg Too Few,” a one-legged man comes in to a casting agent’s office to audition for the part of Tarzan in an upcoming show. The agent is as diplomatic as he can be given the fact that the role would best be played by a strapping young man with exceptional running and leaping skills. “It’s possible that no two-legged men will apply,” the agent tells the applicant, “in which case you could get the part.” Don’t be like the one-legged man in this story, Aries. While I usually encourage you to think big and dream of accomplishing amazing feats, this is one time when you should respect your limitations.

Free Will Astrology (August 26, 2010)

demote it. After all, it’s smaller than both Saturn’s moon Titan and Jupiter’s moon Ganymede. Who wants to bestow the majestic title of “planet” on such a piddling peewee? In fact, let’s make the change now, just in time for Mercury’s retrograde phase, which began recently.

Free Will Astrology (August 19, 2010)

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In the 18th century, the French Academy laid down rules about the differences between professional and amateur paintings. For example, it was decreed that true artists must create a “licked surface,” hiding all evidence of their brushstrokes. The illusion was more convincing that way; viewers could sink their attention fully into the image without being distracted by thoughts about the artist’s process.

Free Will Astrology (August 12, 2010)

Homework: Let’s meet in dreams sometime soon. Describe to me the adventures you’d like us to have together. Truthrooster@gmail.com.

Free Will Astrology (August 5, 2010)

Homework: Imagine that seven years from now you want a new career or line of work. What will it be? Write: Truthrooster@gmail.com.

Free Will Astrology (July 29, 2010)

Homework: What are the conditions you’d need in your world in order to feel like you were living in paradise? Testify at Truthrooster@gmail.com..

Free Will Astrology (July 22, 2010)

Homework: Comment on Bertrand Russell’s statement, “The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.” Go to Freewillastrology.com and click “Email Rob.”.

Free Will Astrology (July 15, 2010)

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Thou shalt not kill” is a crucial rule for you to follow, and not just in the literal sense. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you should also be extra vigilant as you avoid more metaphorical kinds of destruction. Please be careful not to unleash ill-chosen words that would crush someone’s spirit (including your own). Don’t douse newly kindled fires, don’t burn recently built bridges and don’t deprive fresh sprouts of the light they need to keep growing. To put this all in a more positive frame: It’s time for you to engage in a reverent and boisterous celebration of life, nurturing and fostering and stimulating everywhere you go.

Free Will Astrology (July 8, 2010)

Homework: What’s the single thing you could do right now that would change your life for the better? Testify by going to Freewillastrology.com and clicking “Email Rob.”.

Free Will Astrology (July 1, 2010)

ARIES (March 21-April 19): How well are you capitalizing on this year’s unique opportunities, Aries? Since we’re halfway through 2010, let’s take an inventory. I’m hoping you’re well underway in the heroic task of conquering your past. It has been and will continue to be prime time for you to wean yourself from unresolvable energy-drains.

Free Will Astrology (June 17th, 2010)

Homework: Chant this string of magic words five times a day as you visualize yourself feeling happy:.

What Can Happen When Computers Have Too Much Power?*

First there was the botched Facebook IPO which caused alleged losses at some banks totaling $365 million. This was due to so called computer issues with the electronic stock exchange the NASDAQ. Apparently, computers used to drive the auctions were overwhelmed by order cancellations and updates in the opening moments of the IPO.

Much Ado About Nothing – The Facebook IPO!

GEAR

It was the most hyped IPO (Initial Public Opening) in history.  The Company founder, Mark Zuckerberg, is now a billionaire many times over.  But it wasn't without some turmoil that the Soci

A New Aura

Google’s Aura, the online giant’s “hardware accelerated window manager,� remains a mystery to most of the outside world, even according to Geek bloggers. Aura is described by Google as a user interface that will enable much richer visuals than the Chrome browser delivers today.

A New Aura

GEAR

Google's Aura, the online giant's "hardware accelerated window manager," remains a mystery to most of the outside world, even according to Geek bloggers.  Aura is described by Google

The New iPad Can Cost a Arm and a Leg—Literally!

Chinese working conditions affect costs

Even though Apple said initial sales of the new iPad were very strong, something very odd is happening.  Workers at Foxconn's plant Shenzhen, China are being given time off.  A lot of it, i

Apple Records Evolution

Why Would You Buy? It's iPad Simple

As expected, the "new iPad" (as termed by the good folks at Apple, instead of continuing their previous numbering pattern from 2 to 3) hit stores with a boom!

Leap of Faith...feels like more of a crawl than a leap.

Elvis Costello said, "Every day I write the book." Little did he know, every four years his book is one page longer than he expected. I'm talking about Leap Day! Leap Day was last week. February 29, to be exact. Leap Day is an extra day added during a Leap Year, making the year 366 days long instead of 365 days long, like a normal year.

Lent Trap

Lent is upon us, or at least upon Catholics, Lutherans, Methodists and Presbyterians. It's more of a Christian thing, but I guess anyone is welcome to do it. Lent is the time before Easter that the Christian Church devotes to fasting, abstinence, and penitence in commemoration of Christ's fasting in the wilderness.

Happy Black History Month

It's February, so that means it's Black History Month! It's also the shortest month of the year too. How dare they, you might say! Well, before I threw a garbage can through Sal's Pizzeria window, Do The Right Thing style, I found out why it is in the shortest month of the year and calmed down.

Drink Up Birmingham!

There's something about going into a locally owned restaurant serving locally grown food. Sure it feels good and tastes good, but more importantly it makes a whole lot of sense without even thinking hard about it. And I don't like thinking hard about things.

Birmingham Speaks!

I like to talk. I love to talk. Since I also do stand-up comedy, I'd better damn well like to talk. You might say I'm talking right now with this article. Except I'm talking with my fingers. That sounds like sign language so I guess it's not like that at all.

The Other Mighty Quinn

Like the Grateful Dead once sang, "You'll not see nothing like the mighty Quinn!" That song was about an Eskimo. I don't know if Colin Quinn has any Eskimo blood in him, but it's not too presumptuous to say his comedy is mighty. You can tell from the accolades he's getting for his new Broadway hit show, Long Story Short.

Resolve This!

NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS ARE FOR SISSIES!

New years eve is always marked by things that are traditional or for lack of a better word, obligatory.

Christopher Davis meets Christopher Columbus

I know November and December aren’t here yet, and we aren’t even close to Halloween but allow me to say, HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Yuletide Downtown!

Only a few more shopping days till Xmas! And please don’t be offended by my spelling of Christmas. Sometimes Christmas is spelled with an X.

TYRA BANKS MUST BE STOPPED!

PRETTY ONLY GOES SO FAR

First I must apologize for my strange unrelated outburst about Tyra Banks. I know it came out of nowhere. I normally write about things in Birmingham.

Iron Heist!

WHILE GAMBLERS TRY TO COVER THE SPREAD, THE IRON BOWL IS THE PERFECT COVER

Thanksgiving is finally upon us. Time to gather with friends and family to give thanks for what we have. Of course, don’t forget to think of others who have very little.

Ruff & Ready

RUFFNER MOUNTAIN WANTS YOU TO GET ALL UP IN SOME OF THIS NATURE!

If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? Of course it does stupid! You think just cause you’re not around, physics just stops working? You’re so full of yourself.

MONOPOLY IS FOR BOARD GAMES

HOW I LEARNED TO LOVE BEING THE THIMBLE AND STOP WANTING TO BE THE CAR

Unless you have Dish Network or Direct TV, you’re most likely a customer of two cable companies, Brighthouse Cable or Charter Cable. Charter is in the Hoover/ Vestavia area, or over the mountain if you will. I’m in Southside so that makes me a Brighthouse baby.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY! installment!

CANDY CORN IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON

I know I’m starting early. It’s just the first week of November. And the first week is only five days long on the calendar. It’s practically still Halloween!

Halloween Is For Lovers

CANDY CORN IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON

All Hallows Eve is upon us. Or Halloween to you uncultured types. One thing I know about Birmingham, is that we know how to party it up for Halloween!

Hot Seat & Limelight (September 1, 2011)

Come on Irene: Late last week and over the weekend, Hurricane Irene made landfall in North Carolina and tore up the East Coast, causing structural damage, record flooding and a death toll of over 40.

Hot Seat & Limelight (August 25, 2011)

East Coast earthquake: Early Tuesday morning, a 5.8 magnitude earthquake occurred in Virginia outside of Charlottesville.

Hot Seat & Limelight (August 18, 2011)

Je suis bankrupt! It’s become a bit of a running gag in the States how weak the dollar has become compared to the Euro. If we go purely on exchange rank, then the dollar loses. But the Euro may actually be the biggest loser in the end.

Hot Seat & Limelight (August 11, 2011)

Anarchy in the U.K.: Great Britain, historical home of the stiff upper lip and “Keep Calm and Carry On,” exploded with rioting, looting and general civil unrest in the past week.

Hot Seat & Limelight (August 4, 2011)

Bye-bye boonies: The country is failing. No, I’m not spouting some rhetoric about how the United States is doomed to die. (It’s not.) According to the Associated Press, rural America is at its lowest population in history, with only 16 percent of citizens roughing it in the boonies.

Hot Seat & Limelight (July 28, 2011)

Tragedy in Norway: Last Friday, July 22, Norway experienced one of the worst terrorist attacks in recent memory. At around 3:30 in the afternoon, a car bomb exploded outside of the office of the Norwegian prime minister in Oslo, killing eight people and wounding many others.

Hot Seat & Limelight (July 21, 2011)

Duel to the debt: The battle of the budget has been going on in Washington for months now, but we’re quickly approaching a do-or-die moment. A compromise must be reached by August 2.

Hot Seat & Limelight (July 14, 2011)

Rupert on the ropes: A few months ago, it seemed almost inevitable that Rupert Murdoch would take over all sources of news and crown himself King of Media.

Hot Seat & limelight (July 7, 2011)

Their jagged stumps serve to mark the areas affected by the tornadoes. We can rebuild homes and pick up the shattered pieces of life in Alabama, but the barren stretches of land where trees were ripped by their roots from the ground will outline the scars left by the storms for long after.

Hot Seat & limelight (6/30/11)

Bye-bye Blagojevich: Remember Rod Blagojevich? He’s the guy with the funny hair who spent the last few years on TV chat shows trying to convince people he was a good, innocent guy.

Hot Seat & Limelight (June 16, 2011)

Pakistan Strikes Back: Do you remember when President Obama announced that Osama bin Laden had finally been killed, but also cautioned against piling any blame on the Pakistani government?

Hot Seat & Limelight (June 9, 2011)

An Unfortunate Weiner: A month ago, Representative Anthony Weiner of New York’s 9th District was at the top of his game.

Hot Seat & Limelight (June 2, 2011)

U.S. economy slowing: American firms added fewer workers than forecast in May, a sign job growth is struggling to pick up, according to data from a new private report based on payrolls.

Hot Seat & Limelight (May 26, 2011)

Apocalypse Later: Well, we all made it through the “Rapture” promised by a certain Harold Camping last Saturday.

Hot Seat & Limelight (May 19, 2011)

Donald Departs: Earlier this week Donald Trump, hotel / casino / golf course magnate and reality TV star, finally dropped his bid for the presidency.

News of the Weird (Sept 29, 2011)

LEAD STORY The medical establishment generally regards placentas (afterbirth) as biohazardous waste, but to New York City placenta chef Jennifer Mayer, they are a nutrient-laden meat that can alleviate postpartum depression and aid in breast milk production (among other so-far-unverified benefits).

News of the Weird (September 22, 2011)

Lead Story “When I get to Africa, I have to worship him,” said Elizabeth Osei, part-time first lady of the Akwamu people of eastern Ghana, speaking of her husband Isaac, who is the Akwamu chief.

News of the Weird (Sept 15, 2011)

LEAD STORY Richard Handl, 31, was arrested in southern Sweden in July after a raid on his home.

News of the Weird (Sept 1, 2011)

Lead Story Arkansas Time Machine, Back to the 1950s: In McGehee, a town of 4,200 in southeastern Arkansas, a black girl (Kym Wimberly) who had finished first in her senior class was named only “co- ”valedictorian after officials at McGehee High changed the rules to avoid what one called a potential “big mess.”

News of the Weird (August 25, 2011)

Lead Story Berjuan Toys is already selling its Breast Milk Baby online ($70) and expects to have it in stores later this year. The doll works by the child-“mother” donning a halter top with flowers positioned as nipples, and when the baby comes into contact with the a flower, sensors mimic sucking sounds.

News of the Weird (August 18, 2011)

Lead Story For years, many traditional funerals in Taiwan—especially in rural areas or among working classes—have included pop singers and bikinied dancers, supposedly to entertain the ghosts that will protect the deceased in the afterlife.

News of the Weird (August 11, 2011)

Lead Story A More Reputable Career: Thomas Heathfield was a well-paid banking consultant with a promising career in Maidenhead, England, but gave it up this year to move to South Africa and endure rigorous training as a “sangoma” (“witch doctor”).

News of the Weird (August 4, 2011)

Lead Story In January, a baby was born to Canadians Kathy Witterick and David Stocker, but seven months later, they still have not revealed to family or friends whether little “Storm” is a boy or a girl.

News of the Weird (July 28, 2011)

Lead Story The New York Yankees’ Derek Jeter achieved his milestone 3,000th major league hit in July, and Steiner Sports Marketing of New Rochelle, N.Y., was ready (in partnership with the Yankees and Major League Baseball).

News of the Weird (July 21, 2011)

Lead Story On May 21, Jesse Robinson either established or tied the unofficial world record for unluckiest underage drinker of all time when he was booked into the Hamilton County, Ohio, jail for underage consumption. According to booking records, Robinson’s date of birth is May 22, 1990.

News of the Weird (July 14, 2011)

Lead Story Top Gun: Todd Whitehurst may be the “father” of from 42 to 60 children, based on statistical probability that recognizes his virtuosity as a sperm donor, according to a June New York Post profile (though one website, Donor Sibling Registry, claims to have documented 129 children sired by an unnamed seed demon, who is one of 92 highly productive men with 10 or more).

News of the Weird (July 7, 2011)

Lead Story Somehow, upscale restaurateurs believe that diners will soon willingly pay more for a beef dish if it comes with disclosure of the DNA of the actual cow being eaten, according to a May Associated Press report.

News of the Weird (June 30, 2011)

Lead Story Giddyup! When a strain of equine herpes led to a temporary quarantine at horse farms in central Utah, the sponsors of the Davis County Mounted Posse Junior Queen contest in May had a dilemma, but instead of canceling the competition in which the cowgirls show their skills on horseback, they decided to conduct the show except with the girls “riding” stick “ponies” to get style points.

News of the Weird (June 16, 2011)

Lead StoryIn Chinese legend, tea leavespicked by fairies using not their handsbut just their mouths yielded brewedtea that would bring prosperity andcure diseases, and now the historic,picturesque Jiu

News of the Weird (June 9, 2011)

Ellenbeth Wachs, 48, was arrested in Lakeland, Fl., in May on a complaint that she “simulated” a sex act in front of a minor.

Generating the Next Fusion Reaction

Since 1990 and the dawn fun & Stuff, and the first official publication of the Birmingham Weekly in 1997, much has changed in what a newspaper is supposed to do as you can read in the Birmingham News some days but not others. We have spun off several other publications ourselves and they are spinning off as well.

So What is the Other Stuff?

Well things do have a way of rolling around to the same juncture, and maybe that´s what it means that an electron can be in two places at once, and why the Greeks offered wine to their ancestors. Last time I wrote about the year that has passed since I took over the Birmingham Weekly--again.

Number 365

Some of you came to receptions and dinners here, even Rev. Shuttlesworth's 90th birthday dinner--and I had half a mind to think the Rev would appear.

Wilderness into Harmony

We have had lots of prizes and giveaways before, but this is one that requires the most serious commitment. We have been telling you about this one for a while on the back cover of the paper, but now the time is nigh for you to pack up your camping gear and go spend a weekend in Manchester, Tennessee.

Awakening Birmingham

But he does not want stereotypes of what ballet should be to hold it back. He choreographed the new ballet himself. But the new ballet is the story of the beginnings of ballet in Birmingham, when Figueroa, a dancer from the ghetto in Harlem, teamed up with Virginia Simpson, an heiress and patron of the arts.

Now Let Me Tell You a Thing For a Change

I always seem to have a lot of people telling me what I should do. The country girl, for example, would shine a light in my face at a quarter to three in the morning with her marching orders. Scarlet counsels against springtime urges of the blood, though not particularly appealing to reason.

Don't Miss Us Again, Facebook Friends I've Never Met

By the time you read this, if you weren't lucky enough to be there, you may have already missed it. Sorry about the timing. It was good for spontaneous people who were ready to take their jobs at the Gallerias and Harbert Centers and shove them and head on over to join the revolution in Avondale.

En Cada Barrio Revolucion

On March 8, Birmingham Weekly's Avondale Bricks Gallery will unveil its first show, EN CADA BARRIO,REVOLUCIÓN. The title comes from an authentic propaganda poster I pulled down off a wall in Old Havana and brought back from Cuba. You can see it on the cover of the Birmingham Weekly.

THOUGHTS FROM THE PUBLISHER

I am afraid to say I kept quiet for too long. I have been harboring a secret right by our office in Avondale that I have been dying to spring. There was a little hole in the wall restaurant that I could not wait to let you know about. But I did for too long.

THOUGHTS FROM THE PUBLISHER

Yeung Lap Ming wrote to tell me, from far afield by the looks of the name, that he has a lucrative business proposal for me. But John Zidek also emailed to let me know me that I have already won 1.5 million pounds sterling (I added the sterling myself just because I like the way it sounds) in the Liverwood promotion.

THOUGHTS FROM THE PUBLISHER -1 Down, 11 To Go

I also like A Beautiful Mind and not just because of Jennifer Connelly or because they filmed it on my college campus--that's where I walked to class! Right where Russell Crowe is! He only seemed to have lost his mind right in front of Whig-Clio Hall at Princeton.

THOUGHTS FROM THE PUBLISHER

I try not to pontificate at excessive length about politics like some pundits, as I had enough of that to last me. I used to run back and forth between the Capitol dome and the White House every day, and even got to bask in the glow of Bill Clinton's charisma and Al Gore's rosy cheeks' unnatural glow.

Interviews with a Vampire

I did have the pleasure of grabbing a quick interview on the run with Birmingham author Gin Phillips between relieving babysitters and running off on a book tour, and I promise a thoughtful review of her book, Come in and Cover Me, that just came out, as soon as I have time.

THOUGHTS FROM THE PUBLISHER

I hope you are not still too stuffed from the holidays because this just turned out to be a food issue, for various and sundry reasons.

Prepárate

tu periodista preferido en Cuba

National Treasure fan-fic!!!

I'M USING THREE EXCLAMATION POINTS WHEN I KNOW IT'S WRONG. THAT'S HOW AWESOME, PEOPLE!

Batman and Robin, Han Solo and Chewbacca, Henry Lee Lucas and Otis Toole. These great cinematic teams have added a new dynamic duo to their ranks. Benjamin Franklin Gates and Riley Poole are the stars in the classic films National Treasure, and they have taken the world of action by storm.

Choose your own “adventure”!

YOU ARE J’MEL #47 “AMERICAN PIRATE”

WARNING! Do not read this article straight through! This is a special article that allows you, the reader, to influence the outcome while living a life as close to the crippling ennui that is “J’Mel” as possible! Hosannahs!

Geekdom

I posed a question to myself last night: is there a day that goes by when I don’t think about, reference, somehow discuss, or in any way access knowledge about Star Wars. I don’t think that there is.

Happy New Year

Here is the layout. There was a small white case that he had assembled himself over a year ago. It supported the television that he held so dear.

Twelve bullet-points of Christmas!

I was having my usual breakfast of turkey sausage and Peach Nehi when it occurred to me that it was the perfect time for another numbered list!

Dear Santa...

If your love interest has a talent or a hobby, are you expected to feign interest? I mean, are Russell Brand and Katy Perry telling each other how funny/talented at singing they each are or do they just ignore the conversation all together and get to the dastardly business of “doing it”?

Who are you trying to be?

I used to know a guy that decided one day that he was “punk”. We never had a conversation about it, so I don’t know what he thought that definition meant, but I’ll tell you some clues I saw that point to reasons he thought allowed him to make this change.

Stuff about stuff

Have you ever had the fortune/misfortune of watching the series Hoarders on A&E? If you haven’t, then I’m not sure you should. I don’t know if I can in good conscience suggest this show to people.

Be thankful for numbered lists!

Be thankful for numbered lists! It’s that time a year again when people gather together to enjoy the most fattening of meals and find things to complain about. Not me, though. I’m thankful for stuff—so much stuff! You don’t believe me?

There are still dreams to be had...

It was time to retire. He had spent the better part of his youth trying to make a go of it, but it never really gelled into a viable occupation. Briefly, in the beginning he’d been a lot better at masking his contempt for the thankless task but as time went on he found it harder and harder to pretend that he cared.

The basement of the Alamo

It seemed like we were having a good enough time. I mean, I had been a perfect gentleman and the small talk was interesting enough to keep us both occupied. But soon enough, I ran into the new millennium’s perfect date killer: The iPhone.

Today’s lesson

WHAT WE SHOULD ALL LEARN FROM AUTO-TUNED RAPE ATTEMPTS

Now, I’m no hypocrite. I’ve done my fair share of internet video forwarding. Most of them are fight scenes from bad old Indian kung-fu movies or theme songs from long forgotten cop shows. I don’t normally get involved with the more popular trends, or memes as they are now known.

Mickey Miller and the Ghost Machine

A HORRIFYING TALE FOR HALLOWEEN

Hello, Boils and Ghouls! Time again for a terrific tale of terror told in the tragic tradition! This slimy soliloquy comes at you from the vault, just in time for your old friend J’Mels favorite holiday, Halloween! So, sit back, Have some SLOP corn and a SCARY Coke and enjoy! HAHHAHAHAHA!!! (cough cough.

Red: The Color of Love

I saw the film Red the other day. I won't review it here, because the Weekly already employs an awesome review making guy. But seeing the film made me feel really old, not as old as the characters, b

Don’t look now!

CHILDHOOD TERROR AIN’T WHAT IT USED TO BE!

I love Halloween. Not because of the costumes because I don’t really dress up anymore. Plus, you have to be aware of your costume all night and you can’t really chill the way you want. I need to be able to chill properly at all times.

In need of a pub crawl

SYD NEEDS TO PARTY IN MANHATTAN BEFORE THE BIG CRASH

Hi, Kids. Time for a couple of trashy news or pop-culture items, calorie-rich bon-bons to take you away, at least briefly, from thoughts of the sweltering, dysfunctional mess that is your national government, from horrifying images of the Big Crash they promise.