Some of the Nicest People I’ve Met, Part I
I try not to pontificate at excessive length about politics like some pundits, as I had enough of that to last me. I used to run back and forth between the Capitol dome and the White House every day, and even got to bask in the glow of Bill Clinton’s charisma and Al Gore’s rosy cheeks’ unnatural glow. I left DC because I didn’t like the environment. I was aware no one could bear too close a scrutiny, even American icons like JFK, MLK, and even KFC. What I saw this week almost made me come out of retirement.
And I have seen some doozies. Saddam Hussein had only the thinnest veneer of politeness and you could tell he would really like to cut your heart out and eat it. And to tell the truth in my case it would have been better for him to do that.
Fidel Castro I like a lot better because he has a sense of humor--at least when he is not rounding up political prisoners. I had a great picture of us sharing a laugh together at the Presidential Palace till my ex-wife destroyed it. His main problem was that his best and most faithful friends like Che Guevara and Camillo Cienfuegos--who rivaled his charisma, if not his ruthlessness--had a funny way of disappearing and never being heard from again. Funny how the name Fidel means loyal, sort of like turning joy into misery for everyone.
Pseudo-journalist that I am, however, I once wrote up a long interview with Newt Gingrich--when I was for a brief time recruited as a stringer for the NY Times in Georgia- -in which I repeated his words at length and his press secretary later said you trashed us. And I was able to play dumb and innocent because they were his words, not mine, that I used to describe him, and there was really nothing the press secretary could say to that. Of course it is true that I did understand how bad Newt’s own words made him sound. Was I wrong, then?
One thing is for sure: I just failed to put a spin on it, as I heard the TV commentators doing when Newt lashed out at the press for daring to bring up his extra-marital affairs, such as, For example, “Newt has really masterfully put his finger on the pulse of the Southern psyche.” Really?
I actually heard that. I clearly remember when Newt Gingrich attacked Bill Clinton non-stop for messing around with Monica Lewinsky. Now the press is tawdry for bringing Newt’s shenanigans up.
When asked about his ex-wife’s statements at the Republican debate, Newt said that question was “as close to despicable as anything I can imagine.” Bringing up the fact he carried on an affair with wife number three for the last six years he was married to wife number two, that is.
Imagine this: Newt went to the hospital bed where wife number one--let’s call her Jackie—was recovering from cancer to ask for divorce so he could marry wife 2. And wife 2—let’s call her Marianne--is surprised she got the same treatment!
I will not even make all the obvious comparisons to the country girl’s lack of character.
But when Clinton committed an embarrassing little peccadillo on his wife himself—though he never left her high and dry to maybe die from cancer by herself—Newt called for impeachment. He said Clinton- Gore “lacked the moral authority to be President.”
By the same token, aren’t all Newt’s affairs on women he vows he loves at the time, to use his own word, a little tawdry?
I forgot to mention since no one remembers that Newt lost the Speakership of the House (how I do not miss its lofty dome) for repeated and systematic attempts to fund partisan political activities through tax-exempt organizations. So what if that is illegal. In that case Newt Gingrich did not blame the press. He blamed a lawyer for writing him an “inaccurate letter” to say these violations of the Internal Revenue Code were all right.
The country girl could not have said it better herself because of course nothing could more blatantly strike at the heart of the tax code than the arrangements the Newt Gingrich organization not only proposed in their memos but carried out, and this was not some sideline distraction but their main purpose and intent in order to effect their plan to take over the government. And the really surprising thing is that for a while it worked.
How dare the press attack such a defender of American values and paragon of morality? That’s what Newt wants to know. I heard him myself.
Some people have questioned all the railing against a poor country girl with nothing to say for herself, though everyone has known one, and judging by the letters to the editor, can relate to what I’m saying. So let me say this:
If only we could just dismiss totally immoral people as tiresome and move on and ignore them! Well now they are running for president where they can cause a lot more mischief. And should we try to choose a person of character or admit that there really is no such choice and be resigned to it?
Interesting word mischief, which literally means, if you just take a look at the root words of it (miss + chief) that the wrong person is in charge. Haha, there is hidden wisdom in words which I do believe are divinely inspired. In the case of the country girl who knows better than all the bald-faced lies she told, I’m sure, while accusing others of the sins she was guilty of (thus by definition, hypocritical and abusive), it was by admission, her evil twin. So maybe we just feel sorry for her and be glad she is not running for president.
Well maybe her same evil twin is.
Running that is.
Newt has admitted wrongdoing and says he sought God’s forgiveness, but not Marianne’s or anyone else he’s wronged- -according to Newt himself he just moves on and forgets them (a doctrinal loophole that shows his character and also makes a mockery of Christianity--which leads with its chin on that point, in providing refuge for even the most intentionally and maliciously destructive country girl who does her best to harm others then whimpers to God while leaving the smouldering ruins behind, unattended, for other holocausts to ignite and engulf whatever else in flames--that’s no concern of hers because she is going to church on Sunday). Would the same thing even work for Saddam, I wonder.
So what is his excuse? Does Newt have an evil twin too? And should we just say ah what the hell we all do (harbor such an embarrassing relative who shows up for Thanksgiving) and make him president, anyway? And does it matter that he runs around the country attacking people like Bill Clinton for “lacking moral authority to be President” for doing the same things Newt does (except Newt goes all the way, and therefore leaves no DNA evidence on dresses)? Is that sufficient integrity for us? Should we be disturbed by that, or do we just get the joke. Well, some of us anyway.
Or is it that Newt, like the country girl and unlike Clinton, feels no remorse and doesn’t even try to hide it. Do we like that? Hell, you even get the sense he is proud of it. That does not stop them from espousing family values and fiscal responsibility, does it?
Do the presumed conservatives of South Carolina who gave Newt a big victory in their primary the other day just like his feistiness? Or are they telling us that this is what is expected because we are only talking about politicians, after all?
Well, aren’t we all then.