DARREN BOYD WOULD LOVE THIS: Occasionally on this page of our fine publication you’ll find another chapter in the noirish story of Darren Boyd, the Lucky Strike-smoking, liquor-guzzling, jazz-loving private detective who solves mysterious cases by attending the various events we’ve selected as our Weekly Picks. So far, Darren Boyd stories have been little Christmas gifts, and for the moment they’ll remain that way. But if you’re looking for a good mystery, you don’t have to look here. You don’t even have to look in a publication at all. You could simply attend a mystery. What the hell am I rambling about, you ask? I’m talking about Mystery Dinner Theatre at Springville Road Library. Don your cape and hat and pack your pipe, and head down to the library for dinner and a murder. Hitman With a Heart is presenting a baseball-themed you-solve-it supper called “Three Strikes and You’re Out!” It starts at 6:30 p.m. It’s free, but space is limited, so you’ll need to call or go by the library to register. For more information, call (205) 226-4083.
HE JUST WON’T GO AWAY: Maybe Michael Jackson really and honestly had an innocent love for children, and didn’t touch them inappropriately. Maybe he was just massively weird and not a molester. I don’t know for sure. But whatever actually happened between the pop star and the children he invited to his grade-school fantasy of a home was inappropriate if not illegal, and Jackson did nothing constructive to allay concerns or suspicion that he was molesting children. That’s why I thought the post-mortem Jackson character-rehab effort was all a little strange. Separating an artist’s politics from your appreciation of their music is something folks do with some ease, but I’m not sure if one should go so far as to disregard an artist’s alleged sexual abuse of multiple minors in favor of their creative output. But I guess that if you allegedly touch several kids and sing “Billy Jean,” you’re not a criminal, you’re the King of Pop. Maybe that’s a bit too harsh. Anyway, people legitimately love his music, and for good reason. His bass lines were awesome. He will make you feel funky. And we know that when the Alabama Symphony Orchestra performs “The Music of Michael Jackson” for their Sounds of Summer series, it’s not an endorsement of anything other than his talent (we’re often sarcastic on this page, but that was sincere). Well, when they backed patriotic country singer Lee Greenwood several summers back, that bordered on abuse…. but anyway. The concert is in the absolutely beautiful Alabama Theatre at 8 p.m. Tickets are $35-$50. For more information, call (205) 251-7727 or visit www.alabamasymphony.org.SAT 19
PARTY FOR PALSY: Matt Chapman is a pretty funny guy. The 26-year old Vestavia Hills High alum has self-published his own E-book, Chappy’s Thoughts: Why Don’t You Be For Real and Go Make Me a Sandwich?, which is full of short humorous anecdotes and bits of wisdom (it’s available on Amazon). He’s also a blogger—his blog “Chappy’s Thoughts” (www. chappysthoughts.com) is an online continuation of the observational humor in his book. Here’s a taste: “Juicy Juice is the most redundant product ever made…right behind Taco Bell’s Carne Asada (Translation: “roasted meat”) Steak Tacos.” More: “My posse only eats in groups of five. We aren’t down with added gratuity.” Oh, and the guy can also throw a hell of a house party. For several years now, he’s hosted Chappy’s Luau and BBQ Bash, a fundraiser for United Cerebral Palsy of Greater Birmingham. The party has extended hours this year. From 2 p.m. until 7 p.m. there will be all kinds of fun stuff for kids–bouncy houses, tricycle racing, slip ‘n’ slides and more– along with food from Taziki’s. But the real party starts at 7 p.m., with tricycle racing for adults, music by Pharmhand and stand-up comedy by Chappy himself. There’s a silent auction all day, and donations are encouraged. The party is at Chappy’s House, at 2126 Blue Ridge Blvd. in Birmingham. For more information… ask around.SUN 20
RUBIK IS A BAND FROM FINLAND: I do not know much about Finland. I know that it is a country in northern-ish Europe where it is probably cold. I thought that it was a part of Scandinavia, but Wikipedia tells me the Finnish people don’t really consider themselves a part of Scandinavia, in cultural terms. After I listened to some songs by Rubik, a four-piece indiepop band from Finland that is performing at the M-Lounge (in Matthew’s Bar & Grill) on Sunday, I thought that people in Finland speak English, but Wikipedia tells me that Finnish and Swedish are their primary languages. Apparently they only sing in English. Rubik sounds something like Franz Ferdinand and lots of other sort of indie bands. They’re very catchy, intense and fun, which explains how they got to do a tour of the U.S. and Europe. Rubik has a new album out called Dada Bandits, and you can download it for free at www.rubikband.net. I highly recommend that you check them out. Rubik will be opening for the spacebar-challenged band Mewithoutyou and David Bazan. The show starts at 7 p.m. Tickets are $15. For details, call (205) 826-6261 or visit www.matthewsbarandgrill.com.
INSERT POULTRY- RELATED PUN HERE: As you probably know if you’re an involved citizen or a Birmingham resident that’s also a fan of Stuff White People Like, the
Chick-fil-A restaurant chain is looking to open a drive-through store in the old Ruby Tuesday’s location in Five Points South. This has a lot of people in Birmingham up in arms. The primary complaint people have about Chick-fil-A’s proposal concerns the drive-through aspect—Five Points is one of the few walkable neighborhoods in Birmingham, and putting a drive-through location of a chain that Birminghamians dearly love in the middle of it is bound to increase traffic. Have you ever seen the cars backed up at lunchtime at the location on Highway 280? It’s totally bonkers. People don’t want that going on in Five Points, and that’s reasonable. And it’s not as if Chick-fil-A can’t build freestanding stores without drive-throughs (they can and have). The Design Review Committee recently rejected Chick-fil-A’s proposal to hock poultry through car windows in Five Points, and Chick-fil-A appealed that decision. This appeal means that the Birmingham Housing Board of Appeals will hold three public hearings on the matter, one of which was on June 16. The other two will be held on Friday, June 18, and Monday, June 21. The location and times for the meetings are not available just yet, but check out BhamArchitect’s blog (constructbirmingham.wordpress.com) or look to the Facebook group “I Believe in Birmingham” for more information.
RE-COYLE: On August 11, 1921, the Rector of St. Paul’s Catholic Church in Birmingham was murdered. His name was Father James Edwin Coyle, and he was an Irish immigrant who had been ordained in Rome at the age of 23. After serving the Church in Mobile for eight years, he moved to Birmingham in 1904. Father Coyle served as the rector of St. Paul’s until he was shot by a Methodist minister whose daughter’s marriage Father Coyle had performed earlier the same day. The young girl had married a Puerto Rican man, and her father (a Klansman) had less-than-positive feelings about that. There’s a new book about that incident, Rising Road: A True Tale of Love, Race & Religion in America, by Ohio State University law professor Dr. Sharon Davies. Birmingham Public Library is hosting a discussion of the book called BPL@Night presents Conversations on Art, Authors and Life. It’s free, so do yourself a favor and head down to the library at 6:30 p.m. and learn something about Birmingham’s history. To learn more, call (205) 226-3742 or visit www.bplonline.org.WED 23
CHARM CERAMICIST AND THE NIGHT-PEOPLE: Pianist, organist, guitarist, singer and songwriter Grace Potter and her band, Grace Potter and the Nocturnals, have done well recently. They’ve toured with the Black Crowes, appeared on multiple late-night shows, opened for Dave Matthews Band, won a Jammy award and played at the Hangout Music Festival. And several weeks ago, the band released their eponymous album, their fourth studio effort. They are hot stuff, man. The Grace Potter and the Nocturnals album hit #2 on the iTunes rock albums chart and #6 on the iTunes Top 100 Albums chart. The Vermont rockers are performing at WorkPlay at 8 p.m. Hacienda is opening up for them. Tickets are $15. For tickets, call (205) 879-4773 or visit www.workplay.com.
GET NEKKID FOR BLACK WARRIOR RIVERKEEPER: You probably know about Big Nekkid. Guitarists Ben Brooks and Taylor Garrett, bassist Will Sommerville and drummer Roger Jones have been playing around town for quite a while now, and their Southern jam-rock sound has pleased many a listener. But if you haven’t checked them out yet, Thursday would be a great time to do just that. You see, they’re playing for the fourth (of 10) Jam in the ‘Ham shows at Zydeco, a live music series that benefits Black Warrior Riverkeeper. Magic Hat Brewing Co. and March One Music are presenting the series, which has previously featured Darryl Hance of Mofro, Zoogma, and The Pimps of Joytime. Showgoers will be greeted by $5 pitchers of Magic Hat No. 9 and $2.50 tallboys of Pabst Blue Ribbon. There’s really no reason you shouldn’t go. It starts at 9:30 p.m. Tickets are $5 in advance; $7 day-of-show. For more information, call (205) 933-1032 or visit www.zydecobirmingham.com.